Forum Replies Created
-
AuthorPosts
-
June 1, 2017 at 9:06 am in reply to: MPs and would be MPs are very open to discussion at the moment #8193
Time does not permit me to do anything other than attack the Milton Keynes MPs and wannabes. I like your thinking and wish this forum was more linked to the actual agenda of F4J.
Today I have a meeting to start an equal parenting men’s group within Network Rail. 35,000 male staff with links to over 100,000 male contractors and not one “fathers support group”. There are 15 different Woman’s groups at Network Rail.
These guys clean up father who have committed suicide but don’t have any support.
I wonder how many on this forum work on the railway?Ben,
Good luck tomorrow and be cool. If she has agreed to mediation then she wants to chat about things. try and record the session on your phone. Voice Recorder Pro 7 is a good free app on Iphones. Would be good to slow down events for a bit and get her to agree to things staying the same for a while (then you can document it). Living together is a really hard thng to do after a break up – make sure SHE takes some responsibility for the kids too. Good luck!Email me if you need anything: [email protected]
David,
I am not an authority on care orders but one would suggest that both will take about the same time (as appeals take ages) but there is some truth in drawing a line in the sand, refocusing and starting again after 6 months.It may feel like a lifetime but you will be strong! Your children deserve a real father and you will be there!
May 31, 2017 at 2:26 pm in reply to: Court order states I should have overnight stay but ex won't let me #8184Court is horrible. But, doing nothing is even more horrible. The step father lawyer will make no difference in court and you can only go that route if you cannot fix this issue now. Threatening her with court will probably not scare her – as her scum step father will tell her how it works.
there is not a mechanism other than court and a personal agreement with your ex. This may be a long road for you my friend and I wish the law was different.We have all experienced the exact same thing and we are hear to help. Chin up!
Ben, Be strong mate! Chill and think. This is about the kids and stay happy and focussed when you are with them. She will be ruthless to get what she wants don’t just give in usless you see a way forward that you can live with.
Do you have anything documented in regards to the arrangement? If so then she would have to go to court to change it (well that is the law) but if you agree to a change then you will have to be the one to start court. You don’t want court .. you really don’t.
The house is another deal completely and the chances are: whom ever ends up as the resident parent will get the house. But, women have a great way of getting everything so be mindful.My exs name is Claire too, perhaps there is something about the name.
Saad,
Start a new thread and give us some details. We can possibly help…Wow – this is a good one.
I see that she has already decided that she is the resident parent. Does she receive the child benefit or does that come to you?
Do you have any documents stating the 50/50 parenting or that you are the primary parent? if you are the Co-parenting then she is making a power play to have removed so she can take the house and stick you with maintenance. The letter is written by her which is just a threat. She actually does not have any right to demand anything in regards to the kids. Don’t let her assume she is the resident parent!!!!!I am not an authority on the financial aspects but I can advise on the children and maintenance. If you leave a residency with the kids you will lose the house and have to pay maintenance. She can make any allegation she wants, it make NO difference to the finances but may make a difference in Family Court. Her letter does not suggest you have done anything to the children and putting a lock on the door is common practice when sharing a home. You can do the same thing…
I am going to guess – she is also taking advice from a friend, as the letter suggests she thinks she knows what to do to get rid of you. If you are the resident parent than you can claim maintenance against her and also have a right to the house. If you were a woman, you would probably already have these things.From what I can see: you are the resident parent and have the right to do the exact same thing she is. Her use of the police is a very common thing and prepare yourself for false allegations. Get a video camera ASAP or always have your phone recoding video as you WILL need it! She WILL lie and wont think twice about it.
this sounds like the early stages of a big fight. Hang in there and video every conversation and keep records. Many things will be stacked against you but remain calm in crisis.
Can anyone on the forum help with the Financials????
Hey,
This sounds horrible. May I ask what led you to representation, how old are your daughters and was their actually DV??
It is unusual for psychiatrists to be involved nowadays – this must be a very difficult case.Did the children actually say to CAFCASS “I don’t want to see my dad”? this is very important to CAFCASS and may leave the door open for later… but it does sound like you are cooked. Two experts, in the eyes of the court, have spoken and there would have to be some significant new evidence to change the judges mind.
Keep in mind, the final hearing is not actually ever final and the children can make their own mind up in time! My advice is to take the punishment but make sure you can keep the door open for the future… this is about the kids. Not about your ex or citizenship or your representation.
Focus on building a relationship with you kids, if you can. Always be positive and always listen to them – they know you are a good person and one day they will be able to get away from their mum and talk to you. It will happen.Stay strong and keep us posted.
May 30, 2017 at 7:36 am in reply to: MPs and would be MPs are very open to discussion at the moment #8158I have contacted my local candidates too (Labour yet to respond). I have also emailed Suella directly too, thanking her for the support.
My local MP, Iain Stewart – Conservative, has taken up the cause and looks to support an initiative. He was also very supportive with my battles with the CSA. It is amazing how surprised MPs are when you tell them your story and they cant believe the existing laws. I know politicians are supremely good liars but they did look completely shocked when the response from the ICE and Pensions Minister dropped the axe on my case.
May 30, 2017 at 7:29 am in reply to: Court order states I should have overnight stay but ex won't let me #8157Tommy,
Settle in for a battle. The system is not fair and you will have to fight to get to see your son – but NEVER lose contact if you can help it. If you cant have overnights, take full advantage of the visits with him. Alienation is a horrible thing and your ex can easily pervert your sons thoughts if you are out of the picture.
There is no need to see a social worker unless it is ordered by the court and you can easily claim poverty if you need to. I assume you are representing yourself in court? or are the other circumstances to court being expensive…
She has a legal team, huh? I would ignore them and go to court. Then represent yourself and send the lawyers letters every day (this will cost her money for them open and read each one).There is no easy answer to your issue and every court/judge is different. So, nobody will ever know what will happen. But, we will give you as good advice as we can!
Keep the faith! and let us know how we can help more!
That was a month ago and what has been mentioned by the Conservatives (or any party for that matter)? Nothing! We fight, we fight!
May 26, 2017 at 2:01 pm in reply to: Wife wants to leave with the kids to France – should I contest in the courts? #8121Marseille? Wow – now that will certainly the change the issues for the kids. It is a VERY unique situation you are in… if only the government knew how many good fathers ( like yourself) are out there who can make real positive contributions to their kids.
Keep us posted on what you do. Hope we can help.
This is so much like the many of our cases. Once you establish who is the resident parent and you have, for the most part, determined she is the RP. I assume you also pay maintenance…
She now has the legal right to call the shots. Mediation is the right step to take as you need to do that before you can start court. Don’t think that court will solve anything but it may help to create legal visitation with manageable dates and times. The judge will advise but your ex will still have final say.
There in NO connection between visitation and maintenance. So she could demand money and not let you see your son. Prepare yourself for this shock!!!
To answer your question as best I can: You have no actual legal right to see your son until she says it is ok. Only the court can demand that (and this is a very very long road that may not go your way).
But not all is lost. if she is still communicating with you then you are in a better place than most. As the child gets older he will be wanting to see you too.
There are many emotional step and we are here to help!
Court is not great – we all know that, but it is the only thing that resembles authority. You will have false allegations either way and , at the very least, you can represent yourself at court – even if you lose in the Court of public opinion.
Society immediately assumes that the father is bad and mum must have reasons for what they do. The funniest thing about this: Women mistrust other women more than anyone else, so we don’t have any chance.6 is quite young what you do with her now will have huge impact later just like if you lived with her.
There is a bolder move you could make but there are larger risks. If there is not a court order in place and you have parental responsibility and the child is in danger… then you have the right as a father to take control (for the safety of the chid obviously). My ex once went on a drinking bender for 4 days and did not collect my girls after the weekend. By the Tuesday, my solicitor advised me to enrolled them in my local school and contacted social services saying my children’s mother left then. I did not and have regretted it ever since. Sadly, at that time, I was unaware of the hate that was going to crush me from both the curt, system and other side. How different it would have been…
Keep us posted.
Hey,
What is the Prohibited Order for? Just to stop you from leaving the country? Or to stop you from taking the kids away – surely she cannot stop you from working abroad, so I assume it is for not taking the kids.
You can write the court ASAP and show that, because of work you cannot attend and give proof. They should reschedule…That being said, this order doesn’t sound like it matters? You don’t happen to have taken the kids out of the country lately?
Your ex sounds like a class act. Keep strong and it sounds like you know right from wrong!!!!
-
AuthorPosts
