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hey,
There are other posts on court fees and stuff – have a look – you may need mediation first but… contact you country court and follow their guidance on gov.uk site.
Your daughter is 16 and just about falls outside of the court jurisdiction. What I mean is: the court suggests that the thoughts and feeling of the kids is paramount – your daughter is 16 and is easily old enough to tell the judge her thoughts. STAY CLOSE TO HER and never get angry… she will be the one who helps you as your EX will do everything to stop you. The court will probably want the children to stay together as much as possible but this will have to be with your ex wife’s consent, or it gets sticky.
Legally your oldest daughter does not need her mum’s permission to see you and she can do what makes her happy. Be careful about parental alienation – your ex will, without question, try and poison your name to her. hopefully your daughter will see though this and you can stay positive when you are with her!
Check the other posts about court fees. It is not that hard but does take time for things to happen.
If you are worried about going to court then definitely have someone for support who has experience with the courts. I have never used a Mackenzie friend so I am not totally sure how they work or the fees.
At this stage I think it is a real good option for you if you are worried. Does anyone else have any advice on a Mackenzie friend?
April 25, 2017 at 9:25 am in reply to: Ex keeps breaking court order and lieing about inllness to stop contact #7881It will feel like a losing battle… only your ex can determine the outcome and eventually they may get tired of the fight (hopefully).
Don’t send any money now that you are with a judge. I fear the judge may not be quick to ad a penal notice – and even if He/She does, it may not have much weight. It is a bad system but we have to work with it.This does sound like you are on the road to recovery! good luck and let us know if you have any questions.
It took me four weeks and a couple phone calls for the MAIM to finally sign the court document and I could proceed. Be aware that she does not have to accept the mediation. Mediation is only there to create a conversation and cost you more money. The court only works if both parties agree and mediation is exactly the same thing (just one step earlier).
The system is slow and the results are sad – I strongly recommend you keep contact as much as you can. Your ex will learn the system faster than you will. But, I will help anyway I can.
Today is Parental Alienation Day, BTW
Good luck – and let us know if you need anything else.
Wow! this is a tough one. Where to begin…
You are on the right path and good stuff!!! But, it is time to separate the issues as the they do not intersect and may distract you from focussing. This is a very familiar situation to me – as it happened to me too. My ex actually did it twice in two countries. Also, living an independent life is some distance away from now, as these issues will take a long time to solve without her agreement.
Immigration: If she is deported she will more than likely have the right to take the kids with her. Are the children born in the UK? This battle need careful consideration as it effects the kids. My feeling is you may be on a dirt road with this as there are years of appeals and support for her and little resource for you.
Kids: As the mother and as the resident parent (or receiving parent according to the CMS) she has the right to provide for them and have you flip the bill. Have you made any agreement with her for money or visitation? What is stopping you from visiting? Remember to video as much as you can!
Property: In the UK anything you own – she owns. This is both your house and all possessions are joint possessions of marriage. You cannot sell the house from under her as she owns it too. But, why are you paying the mortgage if you don’t live there? I am not saying stop paying it but it is a valid question. The law also says that if you both believe you are married then you are (forget about the issues with the Marriage cert – the lawyers will charge you loads of money to chase this red herring). No matter what language the cert is written makes no difference.What are do you live in? perhaps someone on this site is near by for knows someone?
April 24, 2017 at 9:28 am in reply to: Ex keeps breaking court order and lieing about inllness to stop contact #7872Are you able to represent yourself? I would suggest doing that if you are starting to haemorrhage cash.
Does your court order give specific dates to the contact – and are you set to change the visitation in a month? (you said there was only 2 sessions left?)
Once you represent yourself, you can simply write a letter to the judge saying visitation was missed and you would like to apply for an enforcement order. Now there is a lot to go with that – probably, once you apply for that you now allowing the court to fully dictate what happens with visitation.
Sounds like you have a bit of water under the bridge if you only have contact centre visits. Are you kids old enough to have an opinion about it?
Sorry for the questions but I am here to help if you need it.
You say you will let “Them” know I will pay for these meetings?
Check the family court guidance and you may want to proceed with the mediation – I don’t know if waiting for your ex to decide matters is the perfect option?
You know her better than anyone…I did notice. I think the one of the biggest tragedies is: Mumsnet is one of the suggested support sites by the Family Courts and F4J isn’t. It wasn’t until about Summer last year that I noticed the tiny Dad.info poster in the corner of the bulletin board.
Also there is NOT a anti suicide poster (the number one killer of middle aged men).I also notice that is primarily women that work in the offices of the court. Again, it makes me wonder who is actually running the show?
There is much to read here… hmmmm. Still brings me back to same old thing on Mumsnet: babies equal money. And they are laughing at Suella for trying but know that the laws will never change.
we must be absolute mugs for being born men. How dare us!https://thealienationexperience.org.uk/ is a good resource for PA. I think you definitely have an issue with it and this mirrors a lot of what happened to me. the Advice from Chippy is spot on and I would also suggest making birthday cards and cakes and things with images of you guys together (like on moonpig). Kids will keep those and remember the good times. Also, try and associate songs to your visits. So when they are older the song will spark a fun memory of you. Little steps but will pay off later.
Sadly PA, it is still considered junk science in the UK. I am most certain it is happening all over Britain with horrific long term effects. I sited it in my family court case and all the mum had to do to squelch it was produce a few birthday cards written by my girls to her. Judge felt that was enough to prove the kids were not slaves and I was the evil.
April 25th is International Parental Alienation Day but I don’t know of anything planned in England, Scotland or Wales.
Best of Luck
Tom,
Companies House looks the only way to get you. Limit your info with them and Robert is your fathers brother …The CMS is just the new CSA with the same powers but a more defined plan to screw us. So, if can beat the CSA you can beat the CMS. Imagine how different it would be if no visitation meant no money ( We can only dream of such a system).
My wife has been taking huge chunks of cash for over 9 years – added to 9 years of Family Court and Zero visitation of the kids. Daddy = paycheque
Alison,
Can you have a word with my exwife? lolgive Advice Now a look – it may also be good to talk to the Citizens Advice Bureau. I assume you have names addresses and the like.
There will be a bit of research to do to get started. the more you learn the better because the court option is a long road. We can help you but you, but you have to get started.
What area are you in?
Paul,
This is a tough one.
You need to represent yourself and come up with the cash to start court proceedings. There are ways to start court and waive the fees if you are truly out of money. Check out Gov.uk website and there are step by step instructions on how to do it…It sound like you need some help to deal with this, too. Have you been to the Citizens Advice Bureau? They are also a good place to get the ball rolling.
The common assault charge will be a tough thing to beat for a while but will eventually go away if you prove yourself to the court. Also, if the child was not a witness then it may not make a real difference to the court – but your ex will milk the issue for years.
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